I am a mother of four beautiful children. I love each one of them dearly and differently, but just the same. I am sure all you mothers understand what I'm saying. Each one of my children holds a special place in my heart. A mothers love is unlike any other love on this earth. As children we know this. Those of us who are lucky experience that love first hand. The origin of that love is something unique. A mothers love comes not from the heart, but is born of the soul and I believe it is a direct reflection of Gods love for us. It is a love you cannot understand until they place that sweet little one in your arms for the first time.
I was a strong willed, independent, unmarried 20 year old when I became pregnant with my first son. My relationship with his father was casual at best. When I informed him I was pregnant, he made it perfectly clear he was not ready to be a father and exited stage left. When I told my family and friends the reaction was two fold: there was joy and excitement, followed quickly by criticism and condemnaton. My mother, who divorced my father when I was a toddler and had raised me on her own, was the biggest skeptic. "How will you continue with college, work full time and take care of a baby all on your own?" she wanted to know. Honestly, at that point I had no idea. I hadn't thought that I would be "all on my own", but soon I found that to be the case. Many people who knew me, including my sons father and my mother, suggested I terminate the pregnancy. They told me to chalk it up as a mistake and move on.
That was the first time I recognized the prompting of the Holy Spirit. Actually it was more than a prompting. Everything inside me cried out "NO!" A love and protectivness like nothing I had ever felt, rose up in me. I didn't know much, but I knew my baby was not a mistake, but a gift from God. I was not attending church regularly at that time and hadn't read much of the bible. But at age 14 I had given my life to Christ. I was not skilled in the art of prayer, but I knew who to turn to when I had no one else. I knew Gods promise never to leave, nor forsake me. (Deut. 31:6,8, Joshua 1:5, Heb 13:5)
The first few weeks of my pregnancy were hard, I felt scared and alone. I spent every minute of my free time on my knees, crying and pleading with God to help me. I had never before gone to God in this way and I wasn't sure He would answer. For the first time I searched His word for anything that might pertain to me, anything that would give me hope. And I found SO much!!! God spoke to me from the pages of my dusty King James bible. He told me "all things are possible" (Luke 18:27) and that "I can do all things through Christ..." Phil. 4:13. He assured me He would "direct my paths" (Prov 3:6) and most importantly that "he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins" (I John 1:9).
With Gods help and the Holy spirit to comfort me, I had a happy and healthy pregnancy. On December 11th of that year, I gave birth to the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. For the first time in my life I knew what real love was. I knew I would give anything, go anywhere, fight any battle for the precious baby boy they placed in my arms that day. Now, almost 22 years later, I still feel that way about Juan-Damien, my first love.
I was a strong willed, independent, unmarried 20 year old when I became pregnant with my first son. My relationship with his father was casual at best. When I informed him I was pregnant, he made it perfectly clear he was not ready to be a father and exited stage left. When I told my family and friends the reaction was two fold: there was joy and excitement, followed quickly by criticism and condemnaton. My mother, who divorced my father when I was a toddler and had raised me on her own, was the biggest skeptic. "How will you continue with college, work full time and take care of a baby all on your own?" she wanted to know. Honestly, at that point I had no idea. I hadn't thought that I would be "all on my own", but soon I found that to be the case. Many people who knew me, including my sons father and my mother, suggested I terminate the pregnancy. They told me to chalk it up as a mistake and move on.
That was the first time I recognized the prompting of the Holy Spirit. Actually it was more than a prompting. Everything inside me cried out "NO!" A love and protectivness like nothing I had ever felt, rose up in me. I didn't know much, but I knew my baby was not a mistake, but a gift from God. I was not attending church regularly at that time and hadn't read much of the bible. But at age 14 I had given my life to Christ. I was not skilled in the art of prayer, but I knew who to turn to when I had no one else. I knew Gods promise never to leave, nor forsake me. (Deut. 31:6,8, Joshua 1:5, Heb 13:5)
The first few weeks of my pregnancy were hard, I felt scared and alone. I spent every minute of my free time on my knees, crying and pleading with God to help me. I had never before gone to God in this way and I wasn't sure He would answer. For the first time I searched His word for anything that might pertain to me, anything that would give me hope. And I found SO much!!! God spoke to me from the pages of my dusty King James bible. He told me "all things are possible" (Luke 18:27) and that "I can do all things through Christ..." Phil. 4:13. He assured me He would "direct my paths" (Prov 3:6) and most importantly that "he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins" (I John 1:9).
With Gods help and the Holy spirit to comfort me, I had a happy and healthy pregnancy. On December 11th of that year, I gave birth to the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. For the first time in my life I knew what real love was. I knew I would give anything, go anywhere, fight any battle for the precious baby boy they placed in my arms that day. Now, almost 22 years later, I still feel that way about Juan-Damien, my first love.
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